Jumbo my little Hyenas –

Well, today is Jessie’s birthday and what an incredible day it has been.

We had our early morning wake up call at 4.30am….Jackson came in with our Hot Chocolate – every home should have a Jackson!! We had to be at the front door by 5.00 as it was time to go! Nothing like a restful relaxing holiday……

Isaac, bless him also had to get up early as he is our official driver and he had to drive….which was very fortunate as not only had it rained again last night making muddy bogs everywhere and flooding, it was pitch black but for the stars.

Electricity is a bit of a problem here – there are only certain times of the day when there is electricity. Between 6.00am and 10.30am, and 3.30 to 10.30pm….all very convenient considering we are up and out by 6.30am and back at 7.00pm. Only a small window of opportunity to charge up things and use the computer.
There is WIFI here as long as you are within about 2 yards of the main office so sending emails also isn’t that easy.

Its a bit like going back to nature and Jessie sings George of the Jungle frequently! (It’s a film if you dont know what it is)

If you want to leave your room for any reason once it’s dark, you have to wave your torch around and wait for a security guard as you are never too sure what is lurking around. Last night there were apparently 5 Hippo’s walking around the camp. If you are imagining nice Hippo’s wearing tutu’s like in Fantasia – think again! .These are big ugly prehistoric creatures…..not a tutu in sight. To give you an idea if there was a crocodile and a hippo having a fight – the hippo would win. A little know fact!

But I digress……………..

At 5.20 we arrived at our destination and had to cross the river in the pitch darkness….scary! Once we were on the other side of the river, our adventure began. We went on a Hot Air Balloon ride. The balloon held 16 people – which were divided up into 4 compartments. Jessie’s face was a picture….it said “I cant think of anything worse!” Apparently she is scared of heights! Who knew that…considering earlier this year she went sky diving and bungee jumping. I thought this would be a walk in the park for her! . To cut a long story short, we were briefed on how to land (that’s quite important) and off we went. Once up and running it was unbelievable. We saw Giraffes, Elephants, and anything else that was waking up looking for food. The balloon skimmed over the trees….bit scary but what a brilliant experience. Coming into land was so gentle that our earlier briefing turned out to be more of a “just in case” scenario. Once on dry land, we were met by jeeps who whisked us off to breakfast….in the middle of nowhere, amongst the animals.

Picture this – 16 people – all different nationalities siting in the middle of the Massai Mara on a long table with camping seats. Champagne was served- then followed by bacon, sausages, eggs, mushrooms, baked beans, croissants, danish , tea/coffee AND a pancake station…made to order!!! About 10 yards away, they had constructed a ladies toilet!! It looked like a toilet, did the same as a toilet but at the side there was a bucket of water….it was a self service toilet!! The Gents toilet was everywhere else! We had to be careful not to wander too far as before we had arrived, a leopard had been spotted!! (no pun intended!!)

When breakfast was over we went on another safari drive but this time we were on the other side of the river…. lots going on with crocogators, rhino’s and wart hogs…in addition to everyone else who is a regular in the Massai.

Then it was home time for lunch and a five minute siesta before it was time to go and visit a Massai village….what a shit hole that was. You have to pay $100 ($25 per head) entrance which goes to the chief of the village. That in turn goes towards the community to help for education, sanitation etc. Clearly it’s not used for sanitation as there are no toilets – other than the village! Goats roam freely around, as do sheep, baby cows, dogs and children. The village is built in a circle and the houses’s???? are built of mud and poo – they need renovating every 4 years. A typical house is two bedrooms. No need to worry about bathrooms as they dont use them. Not sure where the kitchen is either. There are no windows and if they want light, they use a plastic bottle filled with kerosene and shove a rag in the bottle and light it. If the smell of poo doesn’t kill you – there’s a good chance the kerosene will. Having sat in our guides house for 10 mins (Jessie wouldn’t sit down…she was just happy retching from the smell) we were given a tour of outside. Sadly for us it has been raining. My espadrills soaked up what was on the ground (didn’t want to ask what it was but could probably have a good guess) Having turned in a 360 degree angle we had seen the whole village – 42 ‘houses’ for 204 people and no toilet!! After that, we were led to the shops…..the shops consisted of rags lain on the floor with various serving spoons, carvings and jewellery laid out….all the women vying for you to buy their goods,,,,in the muck and shit seeping into your shoes!

I think the whole tour took us about 30 mins and then we were off. Now it was time to find the lions as it’s mating season and as you may recall we missed all the action the previous day.

We were in luck.. The lioness from yesterday had switched partners and found a new mate…..they were at it like rabbits. For those interested we have it on video – not a long film – about 20 secs in total. They rest for 5 mins and then are at it again…and again…and again. We left after 4 times deciding that she must be pregnant by now!

Exhausted from our early start and full day it was time to go back to the camp site – wet, cold with sneezy feet – just enough time to get ready for dinner. We are now down to two families (have I told you that already??) Us and the Americans with their travelling battery operated Menorah.

Our table had been decorated with Balloons, banners and an assortment of shiny stars on the table. When it came to dessert, the head chef came out and read some declaration that it was Jessie’s birthday and then all hell broke loose….all the hotel staff appeared, some in national dress, some in chefs whites and some just looking normal, banging spoons, forks, drums complete with guitar and flip flops (they use them as cymbals!) and so the festivities began. Everyone started dancing and singing – and so our party continued for about 30 mins with us and our new american friends joining in. I think they are a bit short on party games. The preferred Kenyan Massai game is jumping up in the air. Just jumping – nothing else. No bouncing as they dont bend their legs…just jumping! We mastered that one quite easily. There is also a song called Hakuna Matata – more of a chant really but we mastered the lyrics. Hakuma Matata ya ya ya,
Hakuna Matata ya ya ya….jump jump jump….bang on your spoons and repeat! The chorus is slightly more difficult…..Hakuna Matata, Hakuna Matata, Hakuna Matata…..then back to the verse.

Then it was bedtime as we had had a very long day and Jessie had definitely had a memorable birthday.

Until tomorrow – I bid you good night

Love

Anna